Essence of Devotion Su2-01 | Tibetan Buddhist Altar

Who’s the Captain of Your Ship?

September 27, 2021 by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo

The following is an excerpt from a teaching by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo called “Essence of Devotion”

The reasons for practice of refuge are known if you understand anything about the horror of cyclic existence. You look outside and see the suffering. You look at the way you are conducting yourself and the way your life is set up and the cause and effect relationships you’ve got going here, and you realize it’s just dumb, fruitless, pointless. There is no future in this. It’s a dead end. At that point the mind turns. That turning is the first step of practicing refuge. What does it turn toward? What does it actually turn toward?

Again, you’ve just looked out the window and you’ve looked at yourself, and the first realization is something like, “I don’t know what to do now. I don’t really know what to do. I know that something is terribly wrong, but I don’t know how to get out of this. I don’t know how to leave the party.” There is a piece of you that understands that you must leave the party. Part of you still wants to be there. Part of you likes to play. Part of you likes to dress up. Part of you likes to be unconscious of the eventuality of your own discomfort—suffering, death, old age, those things—and of the suffering of others. We want to be kind of barefoot and ignorant. Part of us wants that sleep, but another part of us, a stronger part of us, a more certain part of us, understands, “…not enough. It is not enough. I’m hungry. They are hungry. This is stupid.” Part of us gets that.

That first turning is the first indication, the first movement, that is required in practicing refuge. We have to stay kind of absorbed in that turning. That turning should be practiced every day. These very thoughts, these very leaving the party thoughts, should be practiced every day. That’s called turning the mind toward Dharma.

Now we have to look for a way out. How to leave the party? The clue is, once again, the first thing we’ve noticed—the suffering and the trickiness and the seductiveness of samsaric existence, or the cycle of death and rebirth. The cycle of death and rebirth must be addressed. That’s where the suffering is. How do we get out of that? We look at the others suffering. We look at ourselves suffering. We look at how foolish we can be and we think, “What is the method?”

Ah ha! That is the answer! We need a method. The answer to that is to look toward those who have actually found the way out of cyclic existence. In other words, if you want to cross an ocean (and we’re talking about the ocean of suffering, the ocean of death and rebirth, the ocean of samsaric existence),,if you want to cross the ocean of suffering, of course you want to look for a boat. The boat is the method, isn’t it? The boat is the method. Well, wouldn’t you look for a boat? You’re about to cross an ocean. There are no planes. We don’t have planes. You want to look for a boat, right? You’re not going to try to swim it, are you? Swimming it is like saying, “I’d like to be spiritual so I’m just going to be spiritual in my own way and I’ll do my own thing because I’m a really cool guy and I know how to do my own thing.” That’s like saying, “Oh great! I’m going to cross the ocean of suffering. Here I go!” Dive in. How long do you think you’re going to last? A little while, but not very long. Not very long, and the problem with that method is that you often don’t even realize when you’re drowning.

So what we need to do is we need to look for a boat. No, not a boat. We need to look for a ship. In fact, if you’re like me, you’re practical and you really want to protect your hide. You do not wish to cross the ocean of suffering in a rowboat, something weak and puny. Neither do you wish to cross the ocean of suffering in a boat that has not been proven seaworthy—a very important fact, really an important fact. If I were to cross an ocean I would want to know that the boat I am in has crossed an ocean many times and is in good repair. And it’s pure, just in the way it was when it was originally capable of crossing an ocean. We want to know that it’s made it back and forth. This is proven. We know we can make it. Also, if you knew that you were crossing an ocean of suffering with, let’s say, the engineer of the boat, or, let’s say, the guy that swabs the decks… Wouldn’t you be a little nervous? I’d be real nervous! I want to cross the ocean of suffering with the most experienced captain, the one who has crossed the ocean of suffering many times successfully, and returned for me. That’s who I want to cross with. I want the big ship. I want the best ship. I want to know that the captain has crossed.

So in this way we look for the most excellent method, that has proven again and again and again, to produce enlightenment, to produce realization. Not an imaginary enlightenment or realization but the one with appropriate signs, the signs that are repeatable, reportable and visible. Such as the signs that our teachers give us at the times of their death, proof of their realization, and even the signs they give us in their activities during the time of their life. Only enlightened minds can provide enlightened compassionate results.

The Morning After…

February 5, 2018 by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo

The following is an excerpt from a teaching by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo called “Essence of Devotion”

Let’s say that you have suddenly woken up at the party. And you looked outside and you saw this horror—horror that people that you love and respect and know are doing their very best, are trying so hard, are not able to make themselves happy. And you see the suffering. You see hunger. You see poverty. Read the paper, it’s all there—hunger, poverty, sickness, diseases that we can’t cure, and more coming every day. So many different kinds of horrible suffering! Let’s say at the party you woke up and you saw that. And then suddenly you looked at yourself and you thought, “Why am I dressed like this! I look more stupid than I can possibly imagine! This is stupid!” And you realize that you put so much effort into this, beating yourself up and getting the right connections and going to the party, and getting there in time, having a good time. You realize you’ve spent so much energy on that and you feel like… I hate to use this example but, let’s say you ate a couple of tablespoons of nice warm mayonnaise. Bleh. That kind of cloying feeling in your mouth. Isn’t that disgusting? That’s how you’d feel. That’s how you’d feel. You look at yourself, and you look at what’s going on, and you look at the suffering out there and you look at the silly amusement—the silly things that hook us, that make us respond, the ridiculous things that make up our particular individual kind of party—and suddenly you feel like you’re sick of it.

There’s a feeling once you study the suffering of sentient beings and the horror of cyclic existence. It becomes a little bit nauseating, sickening in your mouth. You’ve been eating it your whole life, sickening. You look at yourself go through cycle after cycle of unfulfilling or sometimes negative bad relationships and you just wonder when you’re going to get the big picture, when you’re going to wise up. It suddenly seems like your own lust and your own neediness are kind of like a little sickening. Maybe not all the way yet, but not so cool.

Suddenly you look at yourself and you realize that you’re kind of like a kid, just wearing clothes that are inappropriate. It reminds me of what little kids do. My daughter is not here so I can talk about her again. Sometimes she likes to play dress up, you know. She’s goes into a closet and pulls out everything that doesn’t match and all of the funny clothes that young people think are very dramatic. We took her out for dinner with her friend last night and what they wanted to wear was a funny-looking skirt and blouse that didn’t match, cowboy boots, a cowboy hat, and pants underneath it. It was just a very strange outfit. At this party you kind of look like that. You know, we look at ourselves and we go, “Who put this on me? How did this happen?” It’s that kind of feeling.

So at that point one needs to build on that first inkling of reality, that first inkling of renunciation. That first inkling is precious. It’s like the first taste of pure water in your mouth. Let’s say you are a person who, for your whole life, has had nothing to eat or drink other than, let’s say, salt water, sugar water, nasty foods, warm mayonnaise, things like that that just don’t feel good in your mouth, and suddenly someone gives you just a bit of this precious, sweetest, coolest water to drink—mountain water, pure mountain water. How delicious would that be! Cool and sweet in a natural way. Your mouth maybe can’t even take it in. You’re used to that other stuff and you can’t even take it in, but something inside of you says, “Yes. Yes. This is it!”

The Meaning of Refuge

November 10, 2016 by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo

The following is an excerpt from a teaching by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo called “Essence of Devotion”

When we take refuge in the Buddha, in the Dharma, and in the Sangha, we consider that all of those are equal and they are all one, that they are inseparable. The Buddha, the Dharma and the Sangha are important; the Buddha, because only enlightened method and enlightened presence can bring enlightened result in the same way that apple seeds can bear apple fruit. Grape seeds cannot. You see? Enlightened seed will bring enlightened fruit. So the Buddha. The Dharma in that that is the perfect vehicle, the vehicle that has proven itself to transport all sentient beings across the ocean of suffering.

The Sangha because, within the spiritual Sangha, once you enter into practice and come into a relationship, which you automatically do by taking vows with your vajra brothers and sisters, at that point you have joined with the Sangha. The Sangha becomes then a family.

Talk to some of my students and find out what it means to have a Sangha family. Those of my students who came to the path in a very general way but don’t have experience of various sufferings such as the suffering of grave illness, or life-threatening situations or just terrible suffering on some sort of emotional or mental level, have found that the support of the pure Sangha which gathers around them at times like that, and supports them with practice and prayer and help and love and kindness, is absolutely essential. Without the Sangha we would be incapable of keeping on. It would be so hard. It would be like a little sapling trying to survive in a hurricane. The Sangha is rich with that kind of support and help. Furthermore, it is the Sangha’s responsibility to propagate the Dharma. So the Sangha are considered to be an object of refuge, particularly those with robes and particularly also those who have taken the Bodhisattva Vow because, having taking the Bodhisattva Vow, we can see that they intend to benefit us. Therefore we can rely on them for secure friendship and not betrayal as in ordinary friendships. So the Sangha becomes very precious. And that is the taking of refuge—the Lama, the Buddha, the Dharma and the Sangha.

As for the Bodhisattva Vow, it is said that when one receives the Bodhisattva Vow, if one were to remain secure, absorbed, with a mind spacious and relaxed, absorbed mentally and emotionally and spiritually within the taking of the Bodhisattva Vow, that is to say, extremely mindful, right there with it on a very deep level, appreciating and understanding and grieving for the suffering of sentient beings, as well as our own suffering, and seeing them as being non-dual and longing to help… You look at an AIDS march on TV and you look at people dying and you say to yourself, “Enough is enough! This is awful. This is unacceptable.“ You look at war and you look at the bodies of children laying broken and bleeding in the street and you say to yourself, “This is enough! Enough, not acceptable!” You look at hunger. You look at homelessness. You look at all of it and you say, “Enough! Enough!” To remain absorbed in that, to understand that this is the fate of everyone who is in cyclic existence without the method. To remain absorbed in that, it is taught that, in that moment of absorption, if one were to give rise to such a depth of absorption that tears would come, then at that moment of absorption, you have removed 10,000 years at least, many thousands of years of gross karmic negative obscuration because, for that 10,000 years or however many lifetimes, we have been absorbed in ourselves. Self-absorption—I am! I think! I feel! I will! I must! I need! I have to have! I’m like this! We still are like that, aren’t we? We still do that. But that one moment of absorption in compassionate activity, with pure intention serves to purify so much of that, and gives us the method by which we can continue to remove all subtle and gross obscurations until we at last are free, and until we at last are able to return, ennobled and finally capable of leading others toward Dharma and making for them the auspicious connections so that their days of suffering, while perhaps not immediately over—well it won’t be like flip a switch and everybody is happy, I wish it were like that—but their suffering days, because of your absorption and compassion, are now numbered.

There are many students, of course, who have a connection with me and I will do my best. I will return life after life, not caring whether I am tired, not caring anything. This isn’t just my idea. All the teachers, all the lamas, all the reincarnate lamas, those realized ones, will return without thought for themselves, until the very last one of those sentient beings with whom they have a connection, is finally liberated. If they have to return even a hundred lifetimes for that very last one, they will. I will.

Now if you take a similar vow, even if you can’t fully practice it, even if it’s just the first baby steps, there are those with whom you have a connection and I don’t have a connection, and neither do any of my teachers or any of the teachers who are able, but you have a connection to them simply through ordinary means. They were your mother in some previous life. Who knows? You could have been a cockroach. Some funny little corner in obscure reality where you have a connection with uncountable beings that no one with any realization has a connection with. Do you know what that means? You are their only hope and object of refuge. You are their only hope. So you must take this vow with complete absorption and think that you are taking it for their sake, for their sake, because they are waiting for you. And the moment that you take this vow for the first time with complete absorption and every time therefore that you continue to remind yourself and freshen that vow, their days of suffering are finally numbered. So at that point these teachers all begin to nag a little bit and they say “Hurry. Hurry, because they need you and there is no one else.” So you must hurry for the sake of sentient beings. You must.

There are 3,000 myriads of universes, uncountable lives, connections that must be made and you should pray every day of your life, “Whether I have a good or bad connection with every sentient being, let it bring them to Dharma. Let me find a way to be connected with all sentient beings and let me never pass into nirvana until they are all free.” This is our prayer as a Bodhisattva.

The Burning Room

June 13, 2016 by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo

The following is an excerpt from a teaching called “Essence of Devotion”

When embarking on the path, we look for the most excellent method. We look for that method that gives excellent results every time. That method would be Dharma. Dharma has brought about enlightenment in generation after generation of students and teachers alike. Students have become teachers who have returned to benefit beings, just as I hope you are hoping to do.

Now, we not only need that, but we need an excellent captain, and that captain should be considered none other than the Buddha and his emanations in the world. The Buddha is the one who has successfully crossed the ocean of suffering and has, without a doubt, achieved enlightenment. If you read the life of the Buddha there is no doubt that he has achieved enlightenment. The results of his life—having brought enlightenment to so many others for 2,500 years—can only have arisen from the mind of enlightenment. So we want the proper ship. We want the proper captain. We also need the proper navigator because it’s considered that, while the Buddha is the supreme captain of our ship, it is his spirit, his mind, his nature which is present in the navigator who does the driving and keeps us afloat. And that is our teacher.

So that is the situation that we want to hook up to. That’s how to leave the party, another analogy that we can use. I love to teach in analogies because it’s much easier and simpler for us. We can understand parties. We can understand foolishness. We can understand suffering. We can understand ships and water and the urge not to drown, but sometimes it’s hard to understand Dharma. So I like to learn and I like to express in analogies. One good analogy for understanding our present situation as we embark on the great task of practicing refuge and Bodhicitta is that when we look around and we read the paper and we see our own eventual age and death and all the sufferings that come with it, as well as the sufferings of others, we consider that the two of them are unbearable and they are inseparable. I am suffering, you are suffering. It’s all one package. You come to realize that it’s like you’re in a burning room. You know, the room just burning, burning, burning, burning, on fire, and at that point you look around and you realize that there is one door, one opening, not even a window. One door as an exit from that room, and that door is wide open. How much love and regard will you have for that door, while being in that burning room? Well, we’re so funny, we’re so kind of asleep at the wheel, at least in the first part of our spiritual path. Maybe we don’t even have much realization but, when in our own experience the room really begins to get hot and we begin to see the singeing of our own hairs and really relate to the burning of our own flesh. we begin to see, really see, what the situation is due to our own experience. And we will someday. We will. If not now, then someday. Then at that time we look at that door with such love and regard. In fact, we don’t even think about how much we love and regard the door. We are so into the door that we are out of the door as soon as possible. We love the door. The door is our hope.

It’s like that when we approach the path. As we begin to practice turning the mind towards Dharma, we begin to practice seeing what is in this ocean of suffering, what we are surrounded with. Then at that point, we begin to take in our own real experience and how kind of silly it is when we try to keep on top of our suffering when, in fact, we are suffering and it is foolish to be in denial about that. At that point our minds soften. They gentle and they turn. And suddenly we get smart in a way we were never smart before. Suddenly we’re on Red Alert. Something is different and we begin to regard that door, not as just a shape in a room, but as something that is more meaningful to us than anything else. The path is that door. Our teachers who give us the path are that door. The method is that door. That is our opportunity to exit samsara.

A Teaching to Give You Confidence

June 12, 2016 by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo

The following is an excerpt from a teaching by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo called “Essence of Devotion”

Before I even met His Holiness Penor Rinpoche, who told me I was a Buddhist—I didn’t know this—I had been teaching; and I had been teaching about compassion and the empty nature of phenomena and the empty nature of mind. And you see, I thought that I thought this whole thing up. I thought I had come up with this myself. So smart! Oh well. I thought that what was really missing here was a way for ordinary beings who have been involved in ordinary lives to switch tracks, to come to a place of profound renunciation and acceptance and compassion, and to take a vow that would somehow reach into every future life. I thought the only way to do that was to give them some extraordinary teachings, and make them understand the nature of suffering and the absolute necessity of compassion, and to have them turn their minds in such a way that compassion arose in their minds. In the same way that consciousness appears in the mind, compassion then also appears. And that was my idea—that I had to find a way to do this. So what I did was I began to give a bunch of teachings and eventually called a retreat. And those students that I thought were prepared to go deeper I took on retreat.

We spent a great long time looking at the world and praying for the world and taking responsibility for the world. These students I taught and cajoled and loved and goaded and tricked and manipulated until they would agree to take responsibility for the world and to take responsibility for all sentient beings. They just finally gave up and let me have my way. From that came the writing of a Bodhisattva Vow and I knew that that was the most important turning point and experience in their whole spiritual evolution, and I explained it to them as such. Well, this became a custom. We customarily gave the Bodhisattva Vow. I also began to develop the idea of refuge, of taking refuge in that which brings forth enlightenment, the Buddha nature.

Eventually I met Penor Rinpoche, and he told us that we were Buddhists and that we were practicing Buddhism. I didn’t know anything about Buddhists. I didn’t know anything about anything . Penor Rinpoche came to me and announced to me that I was a Bodhisattva. I was practicing Dharma and I was teaching Dharma and I should keep on teaching Dharma, and I said, “O.K.” Then he gave us the Refuge and Bodhisattva Vows. You see, I had already written this Refuge and Bodhisattva Vow and it didn’t sound anything like what he did because he gave us something in Tibetan! We tried our best to repeat it, but I don’t think it was the same thing. It was a lot more words! So I was kind of a little tense about this and finally when I went to India, I had one of the lamas there translate the Refuge and Bodhisattva Vows and another set of vows that had also been written called the Renunciate Vows for Lay Practitioners, a deeper level of vows. I had them translated into Tibetan and I confessed to my guru, Penor Rinpoche, that I had written these vows and that I had been giving them. I said I didn’t have any other vows and I knew that this was necessary and so, even though these aren’t the traditional vows, I would like your advice on what to do about this. Well, he read the vows and he started laughing and slapping his knee. He thought this was a real gut wrenching hee haw, just laughing and rubbing his knee. Then he said, “About the Refuge and Bodhisattva Vows, if you don’t mind, I think I will continue to give them in the way that I am accustomed to, simply because it’s difficult for a person to learn new tricks. However,” he said, and then he drew himself up to his orthodox lama posture (he is a very orthodox lama), and he said, “I authorize you fully to give these vows.” And he said, “I authorize these vows fully as proper Refuge and Bodhisattva Vows in our lineage.”

That has never happened before. There is a traditional way to give the vows and there is another way, and this is the other way. And at least in the Palyul tradition, he firmly encouraged me to give these vows as often as possible, with teaching. He encouraged me to give them in the way that I have been giving them, because he felt that this is a manifestation of the same vow but done in such a way as to touch the minds and hearts of westerners so that they can remain fully absorbed at that pure moment of ordination which this is. This is an ordination, an ordination of kindness. So he fully acknowledged these as proper vows. That’s why, although they are a little bit different, they are considered to be appropriate, they are considered to be lasting and they are fully authorized in our tradition. A very unusual occurrence, but very important for us as westerners.

The First Object of Refuge

May 17, 2012 by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo

The following is an excerpt from a teaching by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo called “Essence of Devotion”

Although the Buddha that we remember as Siddhartha, Gautama Buddha, Shakyamuni is not present in his physical body as we understand it right now, we look at the Lama as the embodiment of the qualities, intentions, compassion and activity of the Buddha in the world. Our Lamas, those reincarnate Lamas who are recognized as reincarnate Lamas, are considered to be the Nirmanakaya form of the Buddha. They are the Buddha in the world. So we look at the Lama as being the embodiment of the Buddha. We look at the Lama as being the embodiment of the Dharma because, if we were to try to study Dharma on our own, even though all the books in our bookstore are written with the commentary of a qualified Lama, when you read those books you must also have first of all the teachings from the guru that deepen and ripen the mind ..Empowerment, lung, commentary teaching, the taking of vows, those teachings that deepen and ripen the mind, can only be given by the Lama, only be given by the Lama, and you must have them. You must have your mind ripened. A mind that is not ripe may delude itself into feeling spiritual and may even be able to speak spiritually. However, if it is not ripe, it cannot fulfill itself. So we should consider like that.

The Lama is considered to be the path. The Dharma is given to us by the Lama. The Lama connects us with the Dharma. The Lama ripens us in the Dharma. The Lama is the Dharma in that sense. The Lama is also the Sangha because without the Lama there would be no Sangha. It is the Lama’s qualities and compassionate activities that sound the note that eventually calls the Sangha. When one of the Sangha has come to practice in some way, there is a personal and private circumstance that has called them, has pulled them in some secret inner way, particular and unique only to them, and their response is like a bell tolling somewhere deep in their minds—very unique, very individual, very present. That is the gathering of the Sangha and it is done through the influence and compassionate activity of the Lama. So the Lama is the first object of refuge, and the supreme object of refuge on the Vajrayana path. That is our view.